DATE
September 16th, 2013
THEME
"Indestructible" by Disturbed
VENUE
???
ARENA
???
TURNOUT
14/18 RPs
RESULTS CREDIT
DUSTIN M Jack Segment
ABDUL AQ Segment
JAY Full Blog
SHOW RATING
n/a
THE WHITE EXPRESS: With Justin White
Hello folks, and all your dreams have come true, especially all you ladies out there, cause you have been invited to join the White Express.
Nexus had another bad week, Jensen really needs to consider a new network, this is the second time we had to do a blog because of our shows not being aired. Have no fear though folks, cause at least this time you don't get boring Kenny, you get the real voice of EWE, the one and only Justin White!
So here goes, strap on, and get ready for a delayed recap, of Monday Night Chaos.
As the show started, we had our normal card hype up, cause Jensen is original like that, having us always do that to start off any show. Nothing really to say about it, Steele made some of his stupid comments about people he thinks is good, or should win, and I set him straight, said it how it is.
Soon after that though, we was set for our opening contest.
-OPENING MATCH-
Curtis Axel Vs. Christopher Daniels
Heyman went all in, trying to get Axel his job back. The Fallen Angel had none of it, putting a quick and easy whooping on Curtis. Mr. Perfect is turning over in his grave, at his son's most recent pathetic performances, and this wasn't any exception.
Winner via Pinfall: Christopher Daniels
Voting: 3/3
Judging: 6.67 - 0.0
After a commercial, we was tortured with a backstage Christy Chaos Interview. It was brutal, and even worse was Steele, all cheesy like she was doing something good. Whatever the case, she mainly just talked about the Triple Threat and getting her title back (yea, okay). She also hasn't seemed to heard from her husband since the match was made... should I be concerned? I don't know, but I ain't.
Bright side though, that took us back to ringside for another match.
-MATCH TWO-
Aries Vs. Tate Jaxon
Well, what was supposed to be a match anyways. It turned into one sided dominance, and I gotta say, I'm pretty impressed with Aries, keep up the good work. (thumbs up).
Winner via Pinfall: Aries
Voting: 3/3
Judging: 7.93 - 0.0
A quick Commercial came about, before we came back for another match.
-MATCH THREE-
CM Punk Vs. Alessandro Quagliaterre
I guess I should be impressed with the way Punk took it to Alessandro, but I'm really not. I don't care if he claims to be the Best in the World, or if he just very convincingly beat the All American Champion, it doesn't do anything for me. He is better off of achieving gold with the guidence of Paul Heyman, he should ask for his forgiveness. Oh ya I should probably say what really happened in this match, well I did. Screw you Punk fanatics, Punk hit his stupid GTS and got the pin, there, you happy?
Winner via Pinfall: CM Punk
Voting: 3/3
Judging: 8.03 - 0.0
Punk did his celebrating in the ring, like any of us really cared. Well I didn't, alot of the EWE Nation was cheering, but we done established how bright they are. Either way, Alessandro quickly went up the ramp and backstage, not wasting any time.
Another commercial goes by, then we are set for another match, joy. (Sarcasim, morons.)
-MATCH FOUR-
Knights of The Fans Vs. The Shield
So Eli and Thunder stepped up to take on Rollins and Reigns of The Shield. Talk about a complete lost cause, right? Thats the way I seen it, on paper. These two jokes did pull in some interesting moves though, and got me a worried, as they started to gain big momentum over The Shield. I mean, it's crazy for any team to do that, but these two guys? Regardless, Ambrose came with the save before anything. Steele tried to mouth me though, when I said it was stupid for the ref to call the bell, just cause Ambrose got involved, who cares? right? Whatever, biased officiating I think.
Winners via Disqualification: Knights of the Fans
Voting: 3/3
Judging: 14.4 - 6.67
I suppose the post-match is the true big story. The usual Shield Beatdown we was expecting, with 3 against two.. but then that old moron Jack Michaels came down again, this time hailing a chair. Like the smart strategic guys that they are, The Shield knew it was a time to retreat over the barricade, they know when to pick their spots. Let the people call them cowards, they are stupid, I know the truth.
Regardless of that, Jack had gotten a mic, leaving The Shield to stay just inside the barrricade to listen to what he had to say. I don't know why they decided to salvage this part of the show, but there is footage of what happened next, via ewe-wrestling.net63.net.
JACK MICHAELS } Big pop from the crowd as Jack seethes. { JACK MICHAELS JONATHAN STEELE JUSTIN WHITE JONATHAN STEELE JACK MICHAELS } Jack looks into the hard camera and smiles broadly. { JACK MICHAELS } One last MASSIVE pop as Jack drops the microphone and exits the ring. { |
So ya, that's basically what that was about. Jack is going to face Ambrose at Dynamic Destruction. I stand by what I said, the guy is like 90... he has no business in the ring with a guy like Ambrose, this should be one sided.
None the less that took us to a commercial break, before the next match.
-MATCH FIVE-
John Steel Vs. Randy Orton
The Viper has been in a funk ever since Summer BreakDown, this may of been his chance to get things back into order, or then again, maybe not. John Steel, like the awesome guy that he is, he was ready for this battle. Randy's voices forgot to tell him, that Steel is coming back off of a tough night at Summer BreakDown too. I totally woulda rather Steel been named number one contender instead of that other idiot, though I know Steele would disagree. Whatever, end result, Steel got the victory, all you need to know.
Winner via Pinfall: John Steel
Voting: 3/3
Judging: 8.03 - 6.33
Steel looked good I must say, Orton wasn't very pleased though. He needs to tough it up though.
Moving on though, we had a break, and another match.
-MATCH SIX-
Kelsi Parr Vs. Eva De La Cruz
Tell me someone actually cared about this match? I cared about the view, but that was about it. I kept waiting for a wardrobe malfunction, but it never happened, leaving me very disappointed with this match. Whatever, Eva gets the win, good job girl, give ol Justin a call, I can help you with that mystery problem you have. Just gotta hop aboard the White Express.
Winner via Pinfall: Eva De La Cruz
Voting: 3/3
Judging: 7.93 - 6.63
Eva's sexy ass got to celebrate victory, and she looked good doing it, like I said, call me.
Soon after though, we got more footage, that I have compliments of the website again.
}Moments after getting destroyed by CM Punk, Alessandro Quagliaterre is seen hobbling backstage when he's interuptted by Kenny Greenwood.{ KENNY GREENWOOD }Alessandro didn't look to happy about Kenny's bluntness, as he was still licking his wounds from a considerable beating by CM Punk.{ ALESSANDRO QUAGLIATERRE }Alessandro cut straight to the chase, he wasn't in the mood for a long conversation.{ KENNY GREENWOOD }Alessandro thinks about it, and then quickly responds.{ ALESSANDRO QUAGLIATERRE }Alessandro warms up real close to Kenny, looks very excited about that chance of facing Mickie James, and then gives the answer everybody wants to hear.{ ALESSANDRO QUAGLIATERRE }Or gives the answer nobody wants to hear. Kenny looks stunned, Alessandro looks ecstatic.{ KENNY GREENWOOD ALESSANDRO QUAGLIATERRE KENNY GREENWOOD ALESSANDRO QUAGLIATERRE KENNY GREENWOOD ALESSANDRO QUAGLIATERRE KENNY GREENWOOD ALESSANDRO QUAGLIATERRE KENNY GREENWOOD ALESSANDRO QUAGLIATERRE }Alessandro then barged his way past Kenny, to recuperate, as Kenny couldn't believe Alessandro just shunned the opportunity and prospect of a mouthwatering title vs title match at Dynamic Destruction.{ |
Wait, what? (shrugs) Ball's in your court Mickie. Girl you better tell him what for, you're repping the great Queen's after all!
Moving on though, we get a semi-interesting match.
-MATCH SEVEN-
Lyle Saito Vs. D-Dawg
So it was D-Dawg versus... some other guy. I know the guy has some kind of connection with the Returning Hall of Famer Blue Panther. I don't know, I don't care, cause I'm Justin White, that's all you need to worry about. Regardless, I guess. The two did put on a decent match I suppose. Steele certainly wouldn't calm down, the guy needs to just relax sometimes, he can be a bit overdramatic. Whatever the case, The New and Improved, I guess really was New and Improved, cause D-Dawg was able to squeak out a close victory.
Winner via Pinfall: D-Dawg
Voting: 2/3
Judging: 7.63 - 7.53
Following D-Dawg's celebration, and a commercial break. We was all forced to endure another painful interview, this time it was Christy's Husband, Dutch Clark. Footage of that did leak out over the web. I know you can find it if you want, so I'm going to make you find it. I'm Justin White, I do things how I want, you can just deal with it.
After that craptacular interview though, he went to ringside and we was set for the main event
-MAIN EVENT-
Dutch Clark Vs. Cliff Morgan
So it was Main Event time.. and as usual, I could barely hear after that idiot Steele kept screaming next to me. I swear I thought he was going to start dry humping the table when Dutch had control. I personally was pulling for that rookie to win. I know it's not often that idiot Dutch loses, but trust me, when those rare times happen, no one has a bigger smile than this guy. (points to self). I didn't have a smile at the end of this one though, because this wasn't one of those rare times. Cliff gave his best efforts, but Dutch Clark wins again.
Winner via Pinfall: Dutch Clark
Voting: 3/3
Judging: 8.78 - 8.43
Man I hope someone puts this jerkoff in his place. I don't care if he is going nuts or not, all the more reason to knock him down a peg. Whatever the good news comes when our awesome General Manager interupts his celebration to tell him about next week. Where it will be Charismatic Fury taking on The Undisputed and All American Champions, Cashmere and Alessandro... Futhermore it will be a Lumberjack Tag match, that's pretty rare in my books. The best part, is that Johnny said he would hand pick the lumberjacks himself. I can't wait for next week!
I guess that's it, hopefully Nexus isn't being stupid next time, I can't wait for next week, that match I just spoke of, it's going to be great! Til next time, remember to stay aboard, The White Express.
TOP 5 RPERS
1: Dutch Clark (8.78 avg)
2: Cliff Morgan (8.43 avg)
3: CM Punk/John Steel (8.03 avg)
4: Aries/Eva De La Cruz (7.93 avg)
5: D-Dawg (7.63 avg)
-REMAINING-
Lyle Saito (7.53 avg)
The Shield/Christopher Daniels (6.67 avg)
Kelsi Parr (6.63 avg)
Randy Orton (6.33 avg)
Thunder Dragon (5.8 avg)
Eli The Kid (5.6 avg)